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Sunday, July 15, 2012

Going, Going...Gone.


Few people admire the ancient Romans more than I do. It’s true that they suffered from blood thirst and debauchery at times, and they endured a fair share of incompetent or crazy emperors, but Roman society functioned as a well-oiled machine, operating so perfectly that even with a madman as emperor at the top of the political pyramid, the society usually managed to function for the majority of the empire’s people, provided you weren’t a slave. Consider that over forty governments today do a poor job of governing what Rome governed all by itself, using one law and one currency. Sometimes it’s easy to believe that these cultural and military titans were different from us, but today I’m going to prove that, in one respect, they had the same desire as you and me—they demanded clean toilets!


In its heyday, the Roman city of Ephesus had a population of a quarter of a million people. And as the title of a famous children’s book wisely informs: Everyone Poops. Sanitation was a serious issue in ancient times; dysentery could wipe out an army or entire population. The Romans were superb engineers. They invented aqueducts to transport fresh water from great distances, as well as indoor plumbing with hot and cold running water.


This photo, taken on a recent trip to Turkey, shows a two thousand year old public toilet at Ephesus. People would hitch up their togas and have a sit. Water flowed beneath the marble opening to wash away waste, and sponges on sticks, dipped in vinegar, were used instead of toilet paper. Very tidy, but just thinking about it makes me pucker up.


I know you’ve been wondering how the masters of the ancient world took a cr—went to the bathroom, and now you know. Unfortunately, while taking this photo I received the call of nature. Unlike the fortunate inhabitants of Ephesus, I had to walk half a mile to find a port-o-potty.

31 comments:

  1. Interesting. The things they accomplished 2000 years ago are still considered amazing engineering feats today.

    I couldn't help but notice there weren't any magazine racks nearby. ;)

    S

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  2. At least you didn't have to have correct change to use the public potty like in Paris. Ha.

    Thank for the enlightened lesson, I have always wondered about this, and now I can rest.

    The photo gives me a new meaning to "Public Restroom".

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  3. You puckered up? HA! I'm still clenching.

    hee hee hee

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  4. It's sad it took about 1500 years for society to catch back up to the Romans. Things they used to use as TP though are kind of nasty. I mean your own hand or corn cobs...ick. I'd still like to know though how the "three seashells" in the movie "Demolition Man" worked.

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  5. What did the Romans ever do for us? asked a famous Monty Python film. We can now add latrines to their long list of innovations.

    Not sure, though, whether the sponges dipped in vinegar would have agreed with my haemorrhoids!

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  6. Everything you wanted to know about toilets but were afraid to ask. Now we all know. I don't like the way they wiped though. Just saying. Ewwwww.

    Have a terrific day. :)

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  7. Chubby, this post is beheath you.

    Still a good one though!

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  8. I've seen these a number of times. It's the sponges on sticks that always makes me wanna vomit!

    If all those experts are to be believed then the sticks were put into buckets of water after use, ready for the next dumper.

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  9. Well, I'm glad you got to the bottom of that one!

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  10. Urm...it looks so...so...COMMUNAL!

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  11. Call me weird, but this is just the kind of thing I find fascinating~

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  12. I feel so much smarter after having read this. Truly fascinating!

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  13. Hey made out of stone yet. I bet that would bite in the winter?
    Read a historical novel on England set in the time after the Romans had left. Very interesting how things the Romans left quickly fell into ruin.

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  14. Very interesting...it reminds me of the time when we visited Mount Vernon and the tour group was assembled in a guest bedroom of George Washington's house that slept a number of people, like maybe six. A chamber pot had been placed in the middle of the room, and one of the other tourists commented that certainly this was just there for show, nobody would use this in front of all the others... Whereafter the tour guide dryly answered that our idea of privacy was a fairly modern idea.

    In a way, the Roman toilets seem more advanced that the chamber pot, vinegar-soaked wiping sponge and all.

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  15. I guess it's better than standing over a hole in the ground and aiming....

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  16. Yes, i've toured loos ancient and modern, and the Romans had some of the best.

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  17. I wonder how vinegar would feel on my hemorrhoids. . . . not that I actually have any. I was merely pondering the possibility.

    Love,
    Janie

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  18. The sponge on a stick is an absorbing concept.

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  19. Okay, but then what did they do with the stick and vinegar soaked sponge? Inquiring minds want to know? Did they just have communal pots of vinegar with sponge sticks at the ready? Did they figure the vinegar killed the poop germs from the last grunting Roman? Or did each person carry their own sponge stick with them?

    I am fascinated by these things, but I usually end up with more questions. Obviously. This was great! :)

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  20. It's somehow relieving (no pun intended) to know public toilets are much older than the internet. I'm wondering what kind of chatter happened while they had a sit next to each other. Thanks for the education, Stephen.

    xoRobyn

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  21. I've always found that saying, "the call of nature" to be funny! A great post!

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  22. You dive head first unraveling facts not covered in our history books. Was the use of scented oils a way to control an individuals odour?

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  23. The thought of rats, mice, spiders, scorpions and other such creatures makes me pucker up more than the vinegar :)

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  24. other than sanitation what have the Romans ever done for us?

    great post - you seem to have got to the bottom of the subject.......

    groan

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  25. snort ... reminded me of a visit from one of Toonman's friends who looked at this weird old ashtray and said it reminded him of the latrines in the Army .. I didnt ask why/how .. ;)

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  26. Dad can glance at foam on the water and launch into a discussion of sewage treatment methods so I have a fond appreciation for bathroom trivia.

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  27. love your blog! it's a sure thing I'll be laughing out loud within minutes! Cheers...

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  28. You post are always enlightening and often funny. This wasn't my favorite though.

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  29. I don't know what I'd have disliked most - the vinegar, or having to be sociable at this time.

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